Most
people don't realize this, but there are actually
five stages to every relationship. These five
stages mark a particular cornerstone in a relationship,
and understanding them can mean a world of difference
when trying to maintain that
relationship.
The Happy Stage/Romantic
Stage
This
stage can last two months or up to two years. Every
couple is different. In this stage, the new couple
ignores the faults of the other person, while romancing
them as much as possible. This relationship stage is one
of total bliss. Old married couples sneer at couples in
this stage, and tell them that it won't last. A hallmark
of the relationship stage is the way the new couple is
rarely separated, choosing to do all things
together.
The Struggle for Individuality
Stage
After
the romance stage, couples move into the struggle for
their individuality stage. Basically, it can be
described as a power struggle. Couples fight about old
wounds, and boundaries about expected behaviors are set.
While some couples break up or divorce in this stage, it
is an essential relationship stage. Couples learn how to
fight fairly, and how to recapture their independence,
as well as nurture their relationships at the same
time.
Acceptance Stage/ Stability
Stage
In
this relationship stage, the couple has managed to
weather the storm. They've learned how to fight and
accept that their partner is an individual, with
separate needs and goals. The danger in this
relationship stage is that the couple can grow apart,
each seeking their own gratifications, while taking
their partner for granted. It's important that couples
in this stage stay connected.
The Commitment
Stage
In
this stage of a relationship, both partners are ready to
commit fully to one another. They both know and
understand the faults of the other, and accept them for
what they are. Both people in this phase of their
relationship realize that being together isn't a need,
but a want. They know that they are stronger and happier
together, than apart.
Team Stage
This
relationship stage marks the true beginning of 'us.'
Together you face the world united. This is the stage
where a couple may decide to open their own business
together, or take a risk that will affect both of their
lives. In this relationship stage, it's important that
you both make time for each other, so that what you've
built together doesn't stagnate and fall
apart.
Couples
often move back and forth through the different stages
of a relationship. Knowing and understanding which stage
you are currently living in, can help you to move more
smoothly through the current stage of your relationship,
into the next.

